Hello,
As promised here is an account of our first maintenance spanking. It took place on Monday after we talked about my want to try DD again. In the future it will be on a Sunday but we didn't want to wait a week for the first one.
First he had me change into a dress and remove my knickers, then I had to stand in the corner with my hands on my head till he was ready (about 5 minutes), then he bent me over the dinning table and gave me 10 with his belt, after each 1 I had to count and say thank you. Next was another 5 minutes hands on head in the corner before he applied lotion and we cuddled.
Then some more talking, he liked the entire set up. I really didn't like the corner time but as he says I am not suopposed to like it and it did focus me so we are keeping it for now. The only other comment I had was that it didn't do it hard enough, I mean they stung but I have hurt more during play. He said he couldn't get a proper swing where we were but he didn't want to interupt the spanking to find a different position.
I also can't help thinking that perhaps 10 is not enough but i will wait to bring that till I know how hard they are going to be when we find a better place so that he can swing properly.
Hugs
Jess
Wednesday 4 June 2008
New Toy
I bought this new toy on eBay for less than a tenner including postage. Bargain!
I didn't tell Steve I had ordered it so yesterday when it arrived it was a complete surprise. He was over the moon with it especially when he realised he could make it leave red line across my bottom. He loves to see marks but it doesn't happen very often, I must have a resilient bum. They didn't last long though. The other advantage of this is as its not hard he was able to use on other parts of my body, up my back, down my legs etc although only gently, just enough to make my skin tingle but not enough to sting. Can't say that for my bottom though, that was definitely more than stinging when he finished.
I had another surprise for him too, when I had my morning bath I shaved my pussy for him, something he really likes but I don't usually have the patient to keep up. We went out and had a lovely walk across the beach and then we went for a drive. While we were down a quiet lane he had me take my knickers off so he could feel my smooth pussy and then he wouldn't let me put them back on. Which would have been OK had we stayed in the car but went to Asda shopping on the way home. I can't explain how naked I felt walking round Asda with no knickers and shaven.
Well I had better go and get tea started.
Hugs
Jess
Monday 2 June 2008
We talked
Hello,
As the title says we finally managed to have a conversation, well eventually. You see I couldn't get the conversation started so I emailed him instead, then all I had to do was get him to check his email.
We are going to give DD another go but slowly this time and more seriously than the last few times. I showed him some articles on punishment spankings and maintenance spankings and we talked about my need for a different feel to punishment than to play, so that I could distinguish between the two and benefit from the discipline. Turns out that he never really took things seriously before as it always felt like playtime to him too and he was just going through the motions because its what I wanted. A serious lack of communication.
We haven't set any rules properly yet other than a general rule that if I do something I know is wrong but isn't actually a set rule that it is still punishable. A past example would be putting the bath to run and then jumping on the computer for a few minutes, getting carried away and flooding the bathroom. That would have been preventable if I been paying attention so that would be punishable but you can 't lay down rules for every possibilities.
Maintenance spankings are going to be given once a week, on a Sunday at a time of his choice. Nothing too harsh, its just to act as a reminder to us both that we are committed to DD for another week and to wipe the slate clean of any minor disagreements or bad feeling etc.
So all and all we had a great day yesterday. I woke up to Steve's hands exploring my body and we had quite a steamy session including a very erotic spanking with the bamboo stick.
Later in the day we had our first maintenance spanking ready to start anew (will post about it later) followed by more sex including a bit of experimenting with restraints (may post about that later too). Then much later we had a lovely meal and snuggled up in bed watching DVDs.
It was a truly wonderful day.
Hugs
Jess
As the title says we finally managed to have a conversation, well eventually. You see I couldn't get the conversation started so I emailed him instead, then all I had to do was get him to check his email.
We are going to give DD another go but slowly this time and more seriously than the last few times. I showed him some articles on punishment spankings and maintenance spankings and we talked about my need for a different feel to punishment than to play, so that I could distinguish between the two and benefit from the discipline. Turns out that he never really took things seriously before as it always felt like playtime to him too and he was just going through the motions because its what I wanted. A serious lack of communication.
We haven't set any rules properly yet other than a general rule that if I do something I know is wrong but isn't actually a set rule that it is still punishable. A past example would be putting the bath to run and then jumping on the computer for a few minutes, getting carried away and flooding the bathroom. That would have been preventable if I been paying attention so that would be punishable but you can 't lay down rules for every possibilities.
Maintenance spankings are going to be given once a week, on a Sunday at a time of his choice. Nothing too harsh, its just to act as a reminder to us both that we are committed to DD for another week and to wipe the slate clean of any minor disagreements or bad feeling etc.
So all and all we had a great day yesterday. I woke up to Steve's hands exploring my body and we had quite a steamy session including a very erotic spanking with the bamboo stick.
Later in the day we had our first maintenance spanking ready to start anew (will post about it later) followed by more sex including a bit of experimenting with restraints (may post about that later too). Then much later we had a lovely meal and snuggled up in bed watching DVDs.
It was a truly wonderful day.
Hugs
Jess
Sunday 1 June 2008
Domestic Discipline
Hello,
Our recent attempts at the domestic discipline lifestyle have not been very good. I mean when I have done something wrong, Steve tells me I am going to be punished and he spanks me but I'm not left feeling any different really than when mix spanking and sex for fun. I have been going through the motions, apologising after etc so that he feels like he punished me correctly but I don't really mean it. No that's not exactly true depending on what I did I might really be sorry but no more sorry than before I was spanked.
A good example of not really being sorry would be the other day when I was spanked for not putting the DVDs away correctly. Now this is something that really ticks Steve off while I don't see the big deal as long as they are in a case so they don't get damaged. Now I was sorry that I had annoyed him and believe me during the spanking I was very sorry and made a hundred promises not to do it again but once it was over it lost his significance, we had sex and it felt more like foreplay than punishment.
So I want to change that, I want to be truly sorry that I have upset him and sorry enough that I will make every effort not to do it again. I think what I need to do is make punishment spankings a different experience from normal fun spankings even though they do hurt like hell, I want a different sort of hurt but still without real damage.
Some thoughts are
1. Different room
2. Less spanks but with more intensity (hard enough to really hurt but not cause damage)
3. Slowly given so that I can feel each - a pause between each to let it sink in
4. Made to count or say thank you for each stroke (though this might feel silly)
5. Corner time before or after
6. Different position ( something I don't like but can stay put in)
7. Being told off (we have tried this once but I kept laughing)
8. No sex at least not till much later
9. Steve to stay fully dressed
10. Maintenance spankings at the beginning of the week even if I have to have punishment or have just received one
Well these are just a few thoughts I would love to hear from any one who uses any of these things and how it works for them or if you have tried any that did not work.
Also anyone with any other suggestions i would love to hear from too.
I would really like DD to work in our home but I am not naturally submissive to Steve so I know it will be hard, but I am willing to work hard to get there.
Hugs
Jess
Our recent attempts at the domestic discipline lifestyle have not been very good. I mean when I have done something wrong, Steve tells me I am going to be punished and he spanks me but I'm not left feeling any different really than when mix spanking and sex for fun. I have been going through the motions, apologising after etc so that he feels like he punished me correctly but I don't really mean it. No that's not exactly true depending on what I did I might really be sorry but no more sorry than before I was spanked.
A good example of not really being sorry would be the other day when I was spanked for not putting the DVDs away correctly. Now this is something that really ticks Steve off while I don't see the big deal as long as they are in a case so they don't get damaged. Now I was sorry that I had annoyed him and believe me during the spanking I was very sorry and made a hundred promises not to do it again but once it was over it lost his significance, we had sex and it felt more like foreplay than punishment.
So I want to change that, I want to be truly sorry that I have upset him and sorry enough that I will make every effort not to do it again. I think what I need to do is make punishment spankings a different experience from normal fun spankings even though they do hurt like hell, I want a different sort of hurt but still without real damage.
Some thoughts are
1. Different room
2. Less spanks but with more intensity (hard enough to really hurt but not cause damage)
3. Slowly given so that I can feel each - a pause between each to let it sink in
4. Made to count or say thank you for each stroke (though this might feel silly)
5. Corner time before or after
6. Different position ( something I don't like but can stay put in)
7. Being told off (we have tried this once but I kept laughing)
8. No sex at least not till much later
9. Steve to stay fully dressed
10. Maintenance spankings at the beginning of the week even if I have to have punishment or have just received one
Well these are just a few thoughts I would love to hear from any one who uses any of these things and how it works for them or if you have tried any that did not work.
Also anyone with any other suggestions i would love to hear from too.
I would really like DD to work in our home but I am not naturally submissive to Steve so I know it will be hard, but I am willing to work hard to get there.
Hugs
Jess
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